Nighttime

Phasing out naps but having trouble phasing in reasonable bedtimes, due to excessive "deals". Preemptively, nolan will say "Ok, Mommy, I'll have a cookie and milk, then tub, then beavertime. Then we'll read books. Beavertime is odd, we build a den out of pillows and chew wood, and go for a ride in the beavercar to the train store, Nolan is Mommy Beaver and I am Baby beaver. We go to the store after Mommy beaver comes back from work. When Nolan leaves fro work as Mommy Beaver, he gets up abruptly, and assures me (s)he will be back soon. Don't ask as he made it all up.

Tonight he pointed to a Zimbabwean wooden crocodile on the dresser and said "is that from when you were married"? I guess I must have said something in the past, so I said yes, it was from a while ago, after we were married but before he was born. "Was I there when you were married?" No, not yet honey, mommies and daddies sometimes get married first then have kids. "I would like to marry you too Mommy, I love you!" "Oh, sweetie, I love you so much too. Mommies and sons don't have to get married though, being a mommy and her boy is already just as special as being married."

Maybe more so.

Tonight I had some antifungal contracts to read (yawn) a talk on malaria to edit and review for the med 1 class tomorrow, and an undergrad med ed assessment policy to revise. Am done 2 of three, and am bailing. Nolan wouldn't quite accept Daddy to brush teeth, unwrap the towel wrapped post bath "present", or read books so I was running back and forth. When Nolan, post tired, finally chilled enough to sleep he said "Mommy, We will dream about going to Mars and Saturn with the rings as ashtronauts in a rocketship. Wrap me in your arms." Then he kissed me on the lips three times, and was still.

...but no deep breathing, no sleep twitches- afraid I was going to fall asleep myself, I looked closely in the dim and couldn't quite tell if his eyes were open or not...when suddenly he says, in a rush: (Mike had fallen asleep during the first book so he missed this whole thing)

"Mommy how do we get the bubbles to come out of our heads?"
certain I have misheard, I say ".....Ummmm, what?"
"the bubbles! Out of our heads!!"
Slow realization dawns. "You mean like when they have pictures of dreaming in stories??"
Vigorous head nod. "Yes! Like that? How do we do it!????"
He was clinging to awareness, tired to the depth of his 4 year old soul, trying so hard to make a dream picture with the bubbles. So cute I had to sternly suppress a laugh, which would have hurt his feelings.

'Well, honey, in books they have to show a picture of dreams, but that's pretend. In real dreams we sink into sleep like sinking into a deep, soft bed and we see the pictures inside our own selves, like in your head, and it's more like a movie. So you just fall asleep now and I know you'll have a lovely dream".

He was asleep in 5 seconds.